From Darkness to Light: A Personal Psalm

God, why? Are we not already on our knees??

I feel like the the Psalmist, asking "God, where ARE you?" Asking "God, why do you hide your face from us?"

and then I hear a song about the Prodigal Son...he comes back. And I have hope. And I pray...

God, show us your mercy! Give us hope, by answering our desperate cries! Show us just one ray of hope! Please, even now! Please, God...make it RIGHT!

and then...the next song I hear..."What if your blessings come through raindrops. What if your healing comes through tears."

" I know. I know, Lord...what IF...but, why? Why the pain for blessings? It doesn't FEEL like blessings now. I know...

"What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know you're near."

What IF...but, why did You just remind me that there is hope...hope, like the Prodigal Son...returning. And NOW, you're telling me that maybe we NEED this trial to see your blessings?  I don't WANT to see anyone else suffer any more pain! Pain for blessings? I don't understand, Lord!

"What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise."

Oh, Lord...I know. We can't always SEE what You're doing. You're merciful. I know You are...show us Your mercy! Show us! Open our eyes to see Your merciful hand at work.

"When friends betray us. When darkness seems to win, we know the pain reminds this heart that this is not...this is not...our home."

and it hits me...but, the tears don't stop...

Yes, Lord...I do see. You're reminding us that there IS hope...this is not our home. Heaven awaits...no more tears...no more pain. No darkness...no betrayal.

May the hope of heaven...a glimpse of eternity...sustain us and keep us looking up, pressing on toward the goal.  May heaven be our joy...and may Jesus be our Rock...

and again...I feel like the Psalmist, my heart full of praise. A little bit of light in the darkness goes a long way. God isn't distant and neither is His mercy...

Psalm 77

 ¹ I cried out to God with my voice—
         To God with my voice; 
         And He gave ear to me.
 ² In the day of my trouble I sought the Lord;
         My hand was stretched out in the night without ceasing; 
         My soul refused to be comforted.
 ³ I remembered God, and was troubled;
         I complained, and my spirit was overwhelmed.  Selah  
         
 ⁴ You hold my eyelids open;
         I am so troubled that I cannot speak.
 ⁵ I have considered the days of old,
         The years of ancient times.
 ⁶ I call to remembrance my song in the night;
         I meditate within my heart, 
         And my spirit makes diligent search. 
         
 ⁷ Will the Lord cast off forever?
         And will He be favorable no more?
 ⁸ Has His mercy ceased forever?
         Has His promise failed forevermore?
 ⁹ Has God forgotten to be gracious?
         Has He in anger shut up His tender mercies?  Selah  
         
 ¹⁰ And I said, “This is my anguish;
         But I will remember the years of the right hand of the Most High.”
 ¹¹ I will remember the works of the LORD;
         Surely I will remember Your wonders of old.
 ¹² I will also meditate on all Your work,
         And talk of Your deeds.
 ¹³ Your way, O God, is in the sanctuary;
         Who is so great a God as our God?
 ¹⁴ You are the God who does wonders;
         You have declared Your strength among the peoples.
 ¹⁵ You have with Your arm redeemed Your people,
         The sons of Jacob and Joseph.  Selah  
         
 ¹⁶ The waters saw You, O God;
         The waters saw You, they were afraid; 
         The depths also trembled.
 ¹⁷ The clouds poured out water;
         The skies sent out a sound; 
         Your arrows also flashed about.
 ¹⁸ The voice of Your thunder was in the whirlwind;
         The lightnings lit up the world; 
         The earth trembled and shook.
 ¹⁹ Your way was in the sea,
         Your path in the great waters, 
         And Your footsteps were not known.
 ²⁰ You led Your people like a flock
         By the hand of Moses and Aaron.